we have spirit, yes we do

determination is an important step to take right? taking everyday one step at a time, trying your hardest at all you do. Never giving up, being true to yourself. not easy but the only way.

One step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen when it's
Supposed to happen and we
Find the reasons why
One step at a time

happy birthday indeed

read this

it makes you appreciate having your parents around, you know. :)

lololol <-watch this

snort. :p

aaron

My brother's name on a sign! woooooo

can you tell the insanity has gotten to me? so, let me tell you about my brother.

Aaron is three years older than me but none the wiser. :p he tries when he wants to, to be a good brother. usually he's not. but i'm not that good a sister either. I guess we've been friends since we were kids but since he's a boy and i'm a girl, we tend to fight. a ... lot. i remember playing sword fighting with plastic swords when we were kids. I had a plastic dagger so I had the disadvantage. -_- those were fun times. I remember loving Power Rangers and Ultraman with him. :D didn't we all? He has been a good recommender of story books though. Animorphs, Haryr Potter, Terry Pratchett and all my favourite authors mostly come from him. I take after him (though that is technically not possible) in that sense.

sometimes i hate my brother for being messed up and for messing up. he has been through trials so I can't blame him. 'he ain't heavy he's my brother.. except when he's a prick'

so the end!

doggie doggie world

hello world. those are my doggies. you have to like them because there is no other option. the black and white one is Tiny and the brown and white one is Maximus Claudius Aurelius (yes like the guy from Gladiator). so live with it.


:p

hrm

let's see

My day has been. . . . okay. nothing interesting really.

I went for BK at 3.30 to 5.30. TRIED my best to ignore Jonathan Choi's nonsensical talk that annoys everyone. and then I went for mass. I saw Justin after mass and the 'platypus' a.k.a. his younger sister who's name I forgot. She has taken a liking to me.. who knows why? @_@

then we went for dinner.


seeeeee... clearly my blog is going to be unproductive now. i'm writing this for R.O.S.L. so be GRATEFUL.

:S

I am so scared. really. SCARED out of my wits.
growing up is so hard.

shuan weee!!!

Directions: Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog or a note on Facebook with sixteen random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end choose ten people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. Don’t forget to leave them a comment (”you’re it”) and to read your blog. You can’t tag the person who tagged you. Since you can’t tag me, let me know when you’ve posted your blog/note, so I can see your weirdness.

1. I am not short. I AM NOT! -_-
2. I have named a dog I don't have. (its Mr. Periwinkle and he's a PUG!)
3. I used to take ballet
4. I have performed in 4 concerts. =_= (SCHOOOOOLLL ones)
5. I'd like to cut my hair short. =_=
6. My dog doesn't like me much.
7. I like to organise people's lives. i like to organise okay?
8. I hate porridge.
9. I am not that interesting to write stuff about myself that could interest you. :p
10. I want to learn tennis.
11. I have never been to a beach.
12. I have never went for a picnic by the river.
13. I thought a cow was a pig when I was 4.
14. I am highly irritable.
15. I like broccoli.
16. I hate knowing things about other people that I shouldn't know.




I TAG. .... KATRINA! =_= because you're a nice person who MIGHT do it :p

deal?

I think I found the cure for my problem. Believe it or not sometimes these things do make sense. I guess I am more comfortable being in the comfort zone that I don't

step up or step out
speak my mind
speak honestly to any of you

not all the time. just when things matter. for example, when I could not go out to the musical Katrina invited me, I had to write an email explaining my problem because well, I couldn't tell her on the phone or via sms.

when you ask me my honest opinion about something that matters to you, I simply butter you up and keep what I really think inside until I spill it over pages of the book.

when I decide to take up an important position or when I do take on a role I have been coveting, I do it with a twinge of apprehension. afraid that I would not be able to do it well, afraid of what other will think of me.

all that led to my problem. and now that I see it, maybe I can change this and that about myself. Maybe now I can open my mouth more, I can face up to my challenges better. and finally, the problem will go away. finally.

so now, I solemnly swear (in a promise kind of way) to start getting better. okay?

forever?

can we bring that back, please?

***

it's only life.
you were always playing hard,
never could let down your guard,
you can't win, if you never give in,
to that voice within, saying pick up your chin,
baby let go of it , yeah,
don't look away, don't run away ,
baby, it's only life.
don't lose your faith, don't run away,
baby it's only life
Kate Voegele - It's Only Life

- yes, I changed my blogskin again. ;p

carmabelle

true, true.

***

I have not been a good friend have I? I have not been reliable enough to stick through most of what I should have. Instead I just decide to explode without listening to you, through and through. I'm sorry. I just hope that I could understand you one day. I just wish that I could be there for you.

gosh its not easy especially when we are complete islands of each other. Can we not find a compromise? Can we not be best friends again? Just explain it to me and I'll do my best. Please, isn't that what we have stood for for so long?

coco-NUTS?

the best song in the world. :D :D

without you

Cause something changed, you were acting so strange
And it's taken its toll on me
It's safe to say that I'm ready to let you leave

Without you, I live it up a little more everyday
Without you, I'm seein myself so differently
I didn't wanna believe it then
But it all worked out in the end
When I watched you walk away
Well I never thought id say
I'm fine
Without you

I just wanna be alone tonight,
I just wanna take a little breather.

-Hinder

isn't this enough?

One blames the other for losing her special someone. I don't blame the accused for retaliating. the accuser should get that the accused is mad because she was accused.

can't we all get along? You complain about us. We complain that you complain. Your life sucked. You have crap going on. So does the whole world. We don't get you? Fine. We were WRONG. happy now?

this is so childish and pathetic. this whole thing is. what can we do? what can we say? what can anyone do in this situation? I push, you push back. we apologise, we fight. over what? something so miserably pathetic its embarrassing. it is just ridiculous. the whole thing.

i know its not ALL about him. i know everything is just like crap. everything is messed up.
and now this is too.

what are any of us suppose to do?

oh bother

you know what??

i think it is HIGH TIME this stops. let everyone be what they want to be. Its so childish from a outsider's point of view. besides, there are MUCH better things to do right?

***

I'm searching for a graphic blogskin. I'm quite tired of the one I have right now. Something that SHOUTS at people. Shouting might help sometimes. Get stress over with and everything. SHOUT SHOUT SHOUT SHOUT SHOUT. :)

AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i feel better, don't you? :]

***

alright, alright. i DIDN'T get the one that SCREAMED. But this is pretty. simple and 'school'-ish. quite suitable I think.

yahoo

leo
(7/23-8/21)

daily horoscope
Sunday, January 18

Try to make sure you've got all the information you need. That might take all day, but you've got nothing going on more important than digging below the surface and getting the real story.

tic a tac poker

2nd place. woo hoo.

i won. lololol. i know i'm very the bangga.

227

study study study.







days to SPM trials: 227.



















































































damn.

run run run run

I was suppose to go for Timothy's birthday party but I'm having a bad case of the runs. which is TMI. honestly, I think its TMI for telling you that. well, you read it anyway.

GG

clearly with the old Gossip Girl lifestyle being was is most sought after, I know people who have that. The privileges, the cash (which is as cold and harsh in reality), the designer well, everything. there is some truth in GG I suppose.

but it doesn't mean we all can or should be like that. right? If you can, go ahead. If its not you (if you have the money) or you simply can't afford to just chuck your designer shoes out of window (or can't due to the lack of them), being your simple good self is fine. You don't have to go out and bitch about someone or backstab them. You don't have to think other people aren't as glamorous as you are, even if they aren't.

be who you are. stop pretending. its pathetic. i'm speaking for myself. I know how pathetic it feels sometimes and how sad it is to be such a fake. again this is another melodramatic 'phase' that usually teenagers go through, more girls than guys.

let's all make a deal. we'll be who we are. people can take it or leave it. agreed?

woohoo for me. I got 42/58 during our Chemistry test (tuition). yayayayayayay! =.= highest in class, okay? lol.

...

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
And I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I loved
I'll take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

mama

dear mama,
i love you for being my best friend. i love you for being a pain at times. i love you for being patient when i'm a pain. happy birthday!!

:),
Gracie

shut up shut up shut up

i am sick of this you know. I'm sick of being sick of myself. It is rather tiring honestly. Because

who cares if you're not pretty enough?
who cares if people like someone else over you?
who cares if no one gives a damn about how you feel?
you just bolt it up, smile, be patient and scream your brains out in private.

not hard when you're used to it.
don't act like you care, Mr/Ms Reader.

***

leo
(7/23-8/21)

daily horoscope
Sunday, January 11

Try to let your family know that you're doing things your way -- it's easy, and you can keep it civil without losing any ground. It's a good time to express your individuality because people want to see it.

p.s. I don't care if you buy that or not. Right now, i don't care about anything.

enough

enough of everything

enough of the anger
enough of the pain
enough of the annoyance i always feel

enough of the irritation
enough of the hurt
enough of the pretense of being something else

yes, I pretend to be that
yes, I should be more
yes, it should stop

please, i beg you
enough
this is just too much for me

---

I feel like screaming out loud. I thought I did something right. But right now it turned out all wrong. Why? Why did I think it was ALRIGHT to pretend that I was doing a good deed? Why was I acting all 'superior'? I'm nothing. He's the talented one and I, well, I'm the one who jsut thinks she's right half the time.

and today. a major ego booster that was. I hate the way I feel. I hate the way I must have things going my way. Drama, drama, drama. I'm no go getter really. Or maybe I try to act like I'm nto because I know how much go getters annoy everyone.

oh stuff it. I feel like a complete ****

235 and counting

BULLDOG BULLDOG RA RA RA!

sorry. i had to say that. you didn't see that coming right? well, school is school. i have a class/tuition every day of the week. trials are in september. hence we need to be ready for SPM in 235DAYS. holy cow. everything is moving so fast. isn't that exciting? scary and exciting?

i'm sorry i can't type more. the aforesaid number has freaked me out. yay 2009!

explode

when you look back at things you wish you did everything differently. no, this is not the sort of thing where you say 'i wouldn't change' a thing. this is the one where you wish you didn't get the post, where you wish you didn't have the responsibility, where you wish you got out of it when you could. i could have been very different back then. i could have.

but i didn't. i let myself be taken in by the greed inside of me. that greed that only brought me what i did not need. i got the stuff i thought was important but not doing that could have been just as good, maybe even better. i took what i thought was the best. clearly i was wrong. too much work. too much responsibility. i hate it all most days.

the steps that you have to take to get what you want. or at least what you think you want. need some advice? start cracking that skull of yours to see what it is you actually want. what will not burden you in the future. something that will instead propel you to look forward in life. don't buy into what your teachers say or who you want to 'beat'. do what you can cope with or you'll end up hating everything till you die.

equations

30+28+31+30+31+30+31+31+30+31 = 303

what equation is that?
the estimation of days we have until SPM should the exam start on November 1st.

oh shit.